Moving to Dubai is a milestone that needs to be celebrated, and the best way to honour new beginnings is with change – whether that’s in the form of our career, family, or lifestyle. But dreaming of a different life while reality plays out is the real Dubai dilemma. Our mind always raises red flags when it sees a shift in our expected reality. Do we give up and fall back into our old habits for comfort? Will we be successful in our endeavours?
We may start questioning if moving here was the right decision, but whether it’s about moving to Dubai or not, every one of us has been at this crossroad in life. And while this is entirely normal, being at this point means that we start to develop a growth mindset and can be confused about which opportunity to pounce at. While stuck at this crossroad, being mindful about what we want is a good way to solve this dilemma. How do we get in touch with ourselves and know what we truly desire? It boils down to how well you know yourself.
To get in touch with ourselves, we need to use the power of ‘why’. It will help us to bring out our real emotions – then it’s on us to deal with the consequences of that mindfully. The more we learn to ask ‘why’ for every subconscious and conscious habit, the more we will learn about ourselves and our reality. For every ‘why’, there will be one of two answers. We either do what we do because:
- We have figured out the ethics and beliefs around which we have built our lives.
- We are following someone else’s set of ethics and beliefs.
Getting either of these answers can be illuminating. It will help us to decide whether we want to continue our life as it is or if we want a change that will affect our life completely – only then can you beat all your mental and physical problems when you’re truly ready. Even people who reach the ultimate level of self-actualisation can feel like a complete fraud at times. They feel as if all of their achievements and accolades have nothing to do with themselves, and it was just sheer luck that got them to where they are. This is known as impostor syndrome, and it’s a lot more common than we think.
What Is Imposter Syndrome?
Impostor syndrome is essentially one’s inability to believe in their achievements and competencies. People with impostor syndrome think that their success was only a result of their luck and wasn’t a consequence of their talent or skill. These people disregard any proof of evidence that exists to vouch for their competencies. Luckily for you, it can be beaten.
5 Types of Imposter Syndrome and How to Tackle Them
1 . The Superwoman
This type of impostor syndrome may make you think that you’re a fake compared to those around you. To overcome this insecurity, you might find yourself pushing yourself into overdrive. You might feel insecure if you’re not busy all the time, and you find yourself giving your work more preference over your hobbies. You do this to prove that you can always be a superwoman.
When you have this type of impostor syndrome, all you think about is getting validated by others and being appreciated – not being appreciated enough can cause you to have significant mood swings. To beat this, you need to stray away from external validation. Your own validation is your main cheerleader to push you forward in life because, unless you validate yourself, the world won’t follow.
2. The Einstein
The Einstein believes that they are always the smartest one in the room. When somebody or something proves it otherwise, it makes them feel insecure. They think that their intelligence should come naturally, and if they can’t answer a particular question or do a specific job, it demotivates them. They strive towards knowledge and are always on the hunt for expanding their knowledge and skill set. To overcome this, you need to give yourself some room to grow. You might get to your decision slowly, but you’ll surely get there. Being hard on yourself for things that don’t come naturally isn’t a good approach as failing today is only a lesson for tomorrow.
3. The One Who Chases Perfection
As the title suggests, these people set very high benchmarks for themselves and settle for nowhere below perfect. Setting unrealistically high goals and then not meeting them ticks them off, and they continuously beat themselves for not being the absolute best at everything. An excellent way to combat this is to believe in yourself and accept that things take time. The world is not waiting for us to make a mistake and, if we do, accepting our mistake is a good step towards pushing us out of our comfort zone.
4. The Jack of All Trades
The Jack of All Trades believes that they should always know everything and must be able to do anything. Believing that they don’t know enough or can’t complete a specific task sets them off. They feel that they would appear incompetent to others if they don’t know a particular thing. The Jack of All Trades looks for avenues to polish their skills and knowledge in any way that they can. To beat this mindset, you should understand that being an expert in everything isn’t a requirement. Nobody expects everyone to know everything, and hoarding skills and knowledge can even lead to developing a false sense of comfort that can eventually backfire.
5. The Solo Performer
People with this type of impostor syndrome believe that they are their own person. For this reason, you might see them working alone. They do this because they crave appreciation and don’t want to share it with others. After all, working with another person means that the rewards and appreciation will also be shared once the task is completed. The solo performer doesn’t want that, believing in individual effort.
However, one should know when to ask for help. It can be an incredible way of beating this impostor syndrome, especially when it comes to mental health, where there should be no embarrassment in asking for professional help. While impostor syndrome is very real, it’s possible to overcome it. Understanding that the world has a place for mistakes, growth, and improvement can stop you from being too hard on yourself.
Learn more about Aditi Vijay Chandanani and her work as a Life Coach at @decodingquirks_lifecoach.