How do you picture yourself in the future? Would everything be easier then? Will you be happier? Will you have the body you want? Will you have it all sorted out? The truth is, you do not have to wait to become ‘her’ – you can be her right now. Let’s explore how. I want you to spend some time daydreaming into the future – I know, it sounds somewhat counterintuitive to what I just said, but bear with me. Let’s think 10 years from now. It’s the year 2032. Think of the woman you will be.
Where are you living? Who is around you? What does your home look like? What do you look like? What clothes are you wearing? What do you do for work? How do you fill your day?
Build an image of your perfect self – your most authentic and happy self. Start by creating a picture of where you are, what you look like, and what you are doing. I want you to really allow yourself to dream your biggest dream here. If something is not meant for us, I really believe that we won’t be able to imagine it. If we are able to imagine it in our mind’s eye, I believe that means we will be able to achieve it. So, there is a strong element of belief here – belief that what you are dreaming of can be achieved. Once you have created the image of your perfect self, I want you to go inwards.
What do you believe about yourself? How do you talk to yourself?
What are the words and tone you use when you talk to yourself? How do you react to difficult situations? What boundaries have you put in place for yourself and for others? What integrity do you have with yourself? How much do you respect yourself? How deeply in love are you with yourself? Now, as you really think about these answers, I want you to lean into your body and feel how you are feeling. Where in your body do you feel love for yourself? Where in your body do you feel respect for yourself?
The best thing about this exercise is that you can embody the woman you dream of today. You can decide to take on the beliefs that she has about herself right now! You can decide to respect yourself as she respects herself now. The point here is that if you spend a little time and actually think about who the future version of you will be, then you can decide what parts of ‘her’ to embody now.
Think about how she dresses, for example. What kind of clothes make her feel good? What kind of clothes does she wear to school, to run, to cook, to relax, or to go to the gym? Then slowly take the clothes that do not align with her out of your wardrobe. Think about how she speaks to herself. If you see her as encouraging, loving, and respectful, then use that language when you are talking about yourself today.
This takes time, so don’t be hard on yourself if you don’t get it right away. Eventually, you’ll be able to embody her characteristics. When we start thinking like this and start trying to be like that person today, we are actually morphing into that person as it’s not the money, the job, or the body that will make us happy. Instead, it is how we are with ourselves that will take us there. That is self-development.
Another lovely way to use this exercise is to use it to make decisions. If I am stuck on a decision or want to do something in my business or personal life and I’m not sure which decision would be best for me, I ask the future me. I lean into my vision of my future self and think how she would think. I ask her what beliefs she has about herself and then ask what decision she would make today from that new set of beliefs.
The decision-making process comes from your future self. The magic in this is that, sometimes, your beliefs today can limit you and not allow you to stretch or step out of your comfort zone. By connecting to your future self and asking what she would do, you can overcome these limitations. Would your future self take that bold step? Would you make that investment? Would you allow fear to stop you here? Try to list three things that your future self would change. Have fun with it, stretch yourself, and step forward into the amazing woman that you are.